This Couldn't Be Less Interesting To Me If I Was Physically Dead

'Avatar' is nearly upon us, and in this new age of motion capture obsession (and we're not done yet, 'Tintin' still awaits us) I am left so cold by the whole notion that some doctors could mistake me for a corpse. Another example of this technology, 'A Christmas Carol' is coming out now, to mixed reviews, but my favourite is that of Empire magazine, which states that it's not as good as a live action version nor as good as a proper digimation (i.e Pixar) and so 'what's the point ?'. Quite.

'Avatar', James Cameron's new film now has a full trailer. A trailer is supposed to get audiences whipped up in a frenzy of anticipation, desperate to see the film. Sadly, with every new frame I see of Avatar I become more bored with the whole concept. It looks like a very clunky eco message, draped in cartoonish special effects that no-one is going to buy. From the looks of the trailer, all the action sequences are rendered in CGI, and no matter how many pixels they use, it will always look fake. Thus the audience can't engage and so we all get bored with the pretty pictures.

Of course the man whose last picture was the most successful movie of all time was going to be allowed to make anything he wanted, indeed if his next project had been a live action version of his shopping list, no doubt he'd have had them queueing at his door. But that doesn't mean it'll be any good. 'Avatar' has the most boring trailer I've ever seen, it's too long, looks like the intro to a video game, and contains not a single nanosecond of any interest whatsoever. So either Cameron has employed the worst trailer makers in the world, and they have totally misrepresented his master work, or he is about to lay the greatest cinematic turd of his career. And I don't care if it's in 3D either, 3D is rubbish. I want good stories, and acting, not silly high tech gimmicks.

Given that Cameron has spent 12 years away from movies, and has been underwater for much of that time (yeah, let the damn Titanic shit go Jim !) it seems that he might have come up from the depths too fast. Because quite how the director of Aliens, Terminator and True Lies can have come up with something seemingly so dull is beyond me. And you can't trust the movie press either, because they'll be lining up to pleasure themselves over 'Avatar' simply because either a) they think it's cool or b) December is a slow month and they need to sell some magazines. It's like when the Coen brothers release anything, even patent crap like 'Burn After Reading', the press don't dare say boo to the goose. And of course 'Avatar' may be great, I haven't given up on Cameron yet, he's a great film maker. But then so is Spielberg and he made '1941'. So I for one am going to take some serious persuading to spend money in order to watch a bunch of computer generated Thundercats fly around on a screen of computer graphics. I can get that from the Playstation.